Fifth post: something is missing

Uh well, I talked about it with my friends but they think I overreact the whole thing and I shouldn't worry this much (they haven't said it, but they act like it so I guess they think so), but it just makes me nervous. It started in July when I got home from an animecon. I felt something was missing and I couldn't place it anywhere. It was just there. Sometimes I feel it more intensively and other times it seems it is not even there. But then it comes back and I start worry again.

Like I forgot something, like I didn't do something I would had to... or that something had used to be there and then disappeared, and it vanished from my mind too. I can't explain it better.

There are some moments when I feel I get it, it starts to appear in my head and then I lose it again. It will get me crazy. I miss something and I don't know what is it... really, really maddening. July was more than a month ago, nearly two since I was at con, and the feeling is just appears again and again, when I almost think  it's all over. But it is not.

Bit by bit I realized it's harder to remember too. I mean there are phases I can't recall so easily like I did long ago. My memories are more hazy and I rather remember moments than events.

Then yesterday I was trying to do my homework and I opened my biology copybook. There wasn't anything about biology in my sketchbook where I write my homework, so I thought I would look after it, but there wasn't anything in my copybook either and I just couldn't remember what we had done during biology. I was staring and thinking, and it took five minutes to remember we watched a film. I had biology on Tuesday. It was Wednesday.

And it's totally nevermind how I try to remember, every memories I have about Tuesday are when I went to school I was a little upset, nothing, that few information I could recall about biology lesson, nothing, and a new chapter of Bleach came out... then nothing again.

I wouldn't worry but it never happened to me before, and I pay attention about school enough to remember about my lessons. I don't think I was too tired, I was tired on Wednesday as well, and I can't remember if I felt ill or something.

Pffft I'm pretty paranoid. But I can't change my feelings and the whole thing is just creepy.

Sorry for the shitload of crazy things, as my dear friend, Popsi would say.